I recently started a new chapter in life, a chapter that some people love, while others fear it.
Getting a job with my favorite clothing store + brand is a dream come true, and with only two weeks in, I have learned so much about myself and the ability for others to (unintentionally) make me feel like I need to change everything about myself.
(A little bit of back story); the only jobs I have had have either been in offices, or coffee. Complete opposites, but I was mostly used to the coffee world - you could wear anything as long as you made a killer cappuccino.
The first day of this new job was like the first day of a school year, but I wasn’t picking out my outfit for the first impression of my classmates, but the first impression of my fashionable co-workers. Getting there and meeting them, I didn’t feel like I fit in simply based on how I dressed, my hair, even down to my make up. I hadn’t felt this way in years. I felt the need to go shopping right away, get my hair done, I was in a panic.
Let me clarify though, the girls at this new job could not have been more loving + welcoming, and did nothing to make me feel this way. It was all in my own head. But why? I wasn’t hesitant to compare myself right from the start and feel intimidated because I wore a different style jean than someone else.
Getting stuck in traffic seems to be when I get the most thinking done, and I kept asking myself why I felt this way. What was the source? I felt like I was confident with myself, so why did that slip the second I walked through the door? I also know, I am not the first or the last person to feel this way.
We’ve all felt the pressure from the fashion industry, make up industry, or really any industry that we allow to alter our appearance; but why make these negative things when they can be fun, creative outlets!
Be you with what you wear, have your hair a mess, wear make up or don’t, just be creative and be you.
It doesn’t matter what is in, or what other people are wearing, as long as you love it and are confident in it.
Written and loved on by Xanna Kidd
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I look out the window to see the beautiful sunshine. While there is new evidence that spring is emerging around my little home in the woods, I can’t seem to get past the reflection that is looking back at me. I see a young woman who is tired and worn by lies that penetrated her soul for years. I can see the bags under my eyes from another restless night’s sleep, consumed with memories I would like to forget. In the midst of this inner battle, there is a glimmer in my eyes that is becoming brighter as each day comes. I am starting to shed off the lies one by one and unveiling a new and stronger version of myself.
Words have the power to mold and shape those around us. Sometimes people shoot their words out like verbal daggers, never worrying about the slow, bleeding wounds they leave upon their victim.
When you have a constant flow of hurtful words thrown at you daily, it becomes harder and harder to not let them define you.
- When it is all you hear, you begin to believe the lies, the ones that tell you that you’re ugly, or will never amount to much because you don’t deserve it. You give up, you shut up, and you sit nicely and become your enemies’ marionette.
We have to learn to cut the strings, to break free and let go of not only the hurtful words, but the people who have opened their mouths and continually and intentionally brought us down.
The hardest thing I have ever done is realizing that sometimes you have to hit that block button. You have to stop answering the phone calls, and stop returning to that place of hurt. Other people may tell you that burning bridges is not forgiveness, or that you are being dramatic, but stand strong. You can choose to forgive those who have verbally abused you, but that does not mean you have to continue to be their friend, their partner, or even involved family member. This isn’t your incapability to take a joke, or a sign of you being weak. If words have brought you down to rock bottom and have caused you to believe you are worthless, they are nothing more than lies.
They may hurt your core, but they are not your truth. Carrying those wounds for years will only suck you dry of any life you have inside of you. It is time to let go.
For me, learning to let go has been a long process spanning of years of tears and self-searching. Finding that strength like a warrior is not something that happens over night. It is a process of acceptance, of action, and of letting go. It takes time, but eventually the rubble will be moved and I, as well as you, will see the sun again.
You are worth it all. You are worth loving, worth seeing your dreams turned into reality, and worth seeing the beauty that radiates from your core. That is the truth that is trying to shout over the ones that tell you the opposite. Search for it until it becomes so loud that it drowns out the doubts. You are worth the time it will take to finally break free.
Written and loved on by Ali Hightower
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Shout out to our lovely Kory for making this pretty wallpaper for our desktop and phone for the month of JANUARY!!!! CLICK HERE to download! (will download as a zip however if you want it right away double click on calendar and save it to your phone as image)
Quote by Michelle Plett in her latest blog post with us.
"I’m a crusader for being yourself and loving yourself, but I’ve found it hard to practice. I’ll be unavailable for the next 30 days, seeking treatment for my eating disorder… to learn to love myself again, exactly as I am." -Ke$ha
We admire and support your decision Ke$ha. You are beautiful and learning to appreciate yourself is honorable. Keep going, keep fighting, and know you are worthy of love. #swlfamily