Accepting who you are is a better quality then striving for perfection.
I grew up surrounded by people who hated their bodies.
And so I was indirectly taught to hate my body, too. It wasn’t until I graduated high school that I really took it upon myself to rebuild my self-esteem. I stopped trying to change my body and learned to appreciate it the way it is. These are a few of the things I’ve done consistently that really helped me learn to enjoy and love the body I was given.
- Get dressed in front of a mirror. Even if you don’t like what you’re seeing, you need to know what your body looks like. Being familiar with yourself is a key part of learning to love your body. I still do this everyday and it has been incredibly helpful.
- Stop focusing on what your body isn’t and focus on what it is. Try to filter out those thoughts of “My waist isn’t small enough” or “My butt isn’t big enough,” etc. Focus on the good things, like how well proportioned you are or the lovely curve of your calves.
- Pick one thing that you love about yourself and focus on that. Tell yourself everyday that you love your lips, ears, ankles, that little freckle on your left thumb, whatever. Then add something else to the list. If you run out of things to love, that’s okay. But keep the focus on the parts of your body that make you happy, the parts that you are proud of.
- Don’t wear clothes you don’t feel comfortable in. This may seem really obvious obvious, but it is so important. We all have those days when certain outfits just don’t look or feel right. Even if you had planned on wearing that outfit on that day for whatever reason, just take a few minutes to change. Leaving the house in something that you’re not comfortable wearing can ruin your entire day. It’s very important to wear clothes that you feel good in.
- Don’t compare yourself to other people. As easy as it is to compare your body to someone else’s, with the entertainment and fashion industries catapulting their perception of perfection at us from every angle, try to avoid it. No two bodies are the same. People carry weight in different ways. People have different bone structure. You will never look exactly like the models or the celebrities, mostly because a lot of them are airbrushed into oblivion or fabricated from a computer program, but more importantly because your body is so wonderfully different from theirs. And that is something to take pride in. Your body is no one’s but your own; it’s completely unique. And wouldn’t you rather be unique than look just like someone else?
- Appreciate what your body can do and instead of focusing on how it looks. You can sing, punch, run, swim, eat, read, dance, tackle, bike, and jump because of your body. Your body is a magnificent tool that allows you to do all of your favorite things. Realizing and appreciating that is much easier than appreciating how your body looks, and it’s a great place to start in learning to love your body.
Not all of these things will work all the time. And not all of them will work for all of you. But at least give all of them a chance.
And know that this will take time. It takes patience and dedication. Boosting your self-esteem is not something that will happen within a week or two.
It took me a good two years to be completely comfortable with my body. And I still have bad days. There are still parts of my body that I am unhappy with. I still curl up under a blanket and watch Friends, trying to feel better about myself. But I am so much happier in general with my appearance because of these things. I hope they help someone else, too.
Post by Kelsey Griffin!
"Love is the beauty of the soul."
Lovable with Love Handles
I am 115 pounds and I have love handles. An unlikely combination, I know, but it is the thing that has plagued me the most about my body. I find myself in the gym working tirelessly to “get rid” of them. But guess what, they laugh all the way home from the gym. I covet bodies without love handles- and it is a problem.
Recently, I was on vacation with my boyfriend’s family in Michigan. Sure enough, every day I fretted over my love handles. I had this little voice in my head saying horrible things like,
“You aren’t as skinny as you were last summer and everyone will notice.”
“Don’t take or be in any bikini pictures.”
Every time we would stop at the sand bar, I found myself annoying my boyfriend with questions like, “Does my body look like hers? What about hers?” Finally, he said, ” STOP-SHUT UP!! You are beautiful and you don’t need to compare yourself to others in order to validate that.”
He was and is right (don’t tell him that!!). I am never going to be like the models in magazines or the tiny, love handle-less girls at the sandbar. But it’s okay, because they can never be me either. It’s a waste of time and energy to focus on the things you don’t have. More importantly, you forget about the things you do have. I’ll admit, it is a struggle every day to not compare myself to someone else, but I have to remind myself- I am beautiful, strong, and worth loving- love handles and all!
picture courtesy of weheartit.com
How many of you have facebook, twitter, or instagram?
How many of you get excited when you notice a lot of people liking your posts?
How many of you secretly hope one of your posts gets retweeted or on the instagram popular page?
Don’t lie, we all do! It’s cool to see that people like the things that you like! What isn’t okay, is defining yourself by how many people like your picture, or by how many friends or followers you have. It is also not okay to compare yourself to those people who get insane amount of likes or the people on the popular page. Everyone is different, some of us are shy (raising my hand) and others are as outgoing as Lady Gaga! So defining yourself by the amount of likes is just plain silly and it will honestly drive you crazy! Beauty doesn’t come from someone commenting on your photos or getting all those likes on your pics! Beauty comes from knowing that you are the unique, fearless, perfect person you are meant to be. All of your past mistakes have built you exactly into the person you need to be right now- and that’s real beauty.
And of course, don’t forget to remind yourself today that you are SO Worth Loving!
How do you define yourself?
I ask myself this question a lot! Too often, I let the opinions of other people have a large influence on what I think about myself, more than I should.
“You’ve put on weight”
“Do you eat?”
“You have the chest of a 12 year old boy”
“You are so dumb”
“I can’t believe you failed that, it was so easy”
“I can’t believe you did better than me on that test”
“You have a big nose”
“You sound dumb when you say that”
…. And this only covers the bear minimum. Time and time again, I let these things get under my skin and eat at my self-view. I believe these things far too easily, probably because these are insecurities I see within myself. How can I ever be the best version of me when I cannot see past everyone else’s version of me? I can’t. So clearly there is only one option- stop believing the lies. You don’t have to let what they say dictate what you think of yourself. You don’t have to let your doubt and insecurities run your life. You have that power to not believe and you cannot forget that the most important opinion of you is what you think of yourself. Do what makes you happy, live with no regrets, don’t let other people dictate your happiness, don’t let your insecurities hold you back, and always remember you are worth loving no matter what anyone says. If you can love yourself, then you can love others, and spread the message.
Pictures from Weheartit.com
“remind yourself of the beauty the future holds and the beauty within yourself”
Minty Fresh Future
Mint is a must have color this spring! Jeans, shoes, shirts! It’s everywhere! Personally, I love it, not only for the cutesy vibe it gives off, but also for the meaning it has to me. When I see the color mint I think- fresh, clean, & beautiful. It isn’t over powering, but instead subtle, calm, and pretty. Much like my future- fresh, clean, and beautiful. I have all the opportunity in the world and my mistakes aren’t holding me back or overpowering me. It took me a while to realize that the place I am right now is exactly where I need to be. My past mistakes, failures, and issues have built me into the person I am today. I know that I have a clean, fresh, beautiful future ahead of me- no matter what mess I have made in the past. So instead of grabbing a pair of regular jean shorts this summer, grab a mint pair and remind yourself of the beauty the future holds and the beauty within yourself. And of course, never forget that you are So Worth Loving :)
pictures from weheartit.com
“You don’t need anything more in your life to be someone great….”
Have you ever looked at the lives of people around you and then came back to yourself with a yucky feeling inside questioning why you don’t have what they have or how you could be at such a different place in life than them? *raises hand* I have. It’s part jealousy – part insecurity.
I have looked at my friends’ lives and compared my own life to theirs only seeing the positives in their own and the negatives in mine. I saw how far ahead some of them were in their schooling, in their careers (yes, careers, not just jobs), and life in general. I thought how did I mess everything up so much to end up where I am? ..So far from where I thought I should be and where society said I should be. I was mad at myself and comparing myself to others success only made things worse.
Are you comparing yourself to someone else or someone else’s accomplishments? If so, Stop! When we do things like that we are only hurting ourselves. I came to realize that looking at my life in such a way that could only make me wish I had more to prove of myself was pretty ridiculous. It doesn’t matter where I am in life or what I have accomplished at this point in time- None of those things make me more or less loveable and the same goes for you.
You don’t need anything more in your life to be someone great, or to be more valued, or to have a better looking life— You are already worth so much more than you can imagine. Where you’re at in life does not define your worth.
It can be so easy to fall into a place of self-hate when you compare yourself to others; don’t do that to yourself. When you stop comparing, you open up your world and yourself to a newfound freedom that gives you the magic and the beauty to just be yourself!
Love yourself where you are, for who you are.
POST BY ROSIE HANKE
there is beauty in everything.
Tell someone they have so much worth. Did you know that the flower “Alyssum” means worth beyond beauty??
you are not perfect and that is ok- no one is perfect.