Who We are:

                 

It’s the time of the year when there are new beginnings. Fall is on its way, which means the school bells start ringing.  No matter how old you are, school can be a rough environment. Not all the time, but it certainly can be; especially in your teenage years. High school is a jungle of people trying to find themselves and figure out what they want in life. Certain things that happen on that journey may or may not lower our self esteem and make us feel bad about ourselves. From bullies, to cliches, to down right crummy relationships, it’s no wonder teens are angsty and frustrated with the world and themselves. 

You may see people sitting by themselves at lunch, while a crowd is laughing under their breathe. You may know that one guy in your science class that no one has taken the chance to get to know because he seems different. Even the girl who is the Regina George (Mean Girls reference) of the school is hurting inside. Everyone is searching, wondering, and hurting, they may just hide it differently then you. 

And if you are the girl sitting alone, or the different one in class, by no means does that define you. If I could change one thing about high school, it would be that people feel the need to let how they are treated in high school define them for life. The people I found at lunch alone are the most amazing people I know today. 

Guess what, HERE’S THE SECRET…the sooner we see that we are worth loving, the road gets so much easier! And once we realize it about ourselves, we can spread the love and make others feel loved as well. How awesome is that to have the satisfaction of knowing we are worth loving, loved, and share with others that they are as well. 

I challenge you to start this school year with confidence that you and everyone around you is worth love. Sit with the people who are alone, they may turn out to be the most genuine, nice people you know. The science guy who seems different may have a sense of humor that will have you laughing out of your chair. And the Regina George may think twice before bullying .You won’t know how big of an impact your confidence may have on someone else until you proudly show it. 

             Throughout life each of us come in contact with thousands of people. Many of them come and go quickly, rarely affecting our lives in a dramatic way. However, sometimes people stay and take time to make an investment in your life. They pursue a friendship. These people that we take on life with are often so constant that we take them for granted. Or at least I often do. This message is for them, for all the ones who have been there for us through every season of life and of the heart. 

            Recently I have been going through changes in my life, whether it is transitioning into a new job or college classes, making daily routines work, or letting go of dead weight. During this change it is difficult to make the time for close friends or have any social life at all for that matter. However, it is very important that during the week we make time for those who make time for us. In my eyes, that’s the only way we can continue to build better bridges.

            I realized this last week. I started thinking that in order to keep good solid friends in my life, I had to meet them half way. I had to let them know they were important to me. This is something many of us struggle with; we ask, “Why hasn’t anyone asked to hang out? Why hasn’t anyone called or texted me back?” .  I can’t help but to think..  ”Do these people know how I feel? Do they know I want them around more; that I want to make a better effort in strengthening your friendship.” Most likely not. So I will choose to reach out more.

            A friend who I have looked up to for a long time had not been constant in my life. Yes, we had surface talks and said a couple “what’s up man, I miss seeing you,” over the past months but no real conversation. No real investment. So we finally found a time to sit down for breakfast and just talk about what we have been up to. Talks of relationships, life changes and even river tubing while we drank our morning coffee. Something was different than any talk we had in the past year. I realized how refreshing it was to talk about my ups and downs with someone who really cared and gave me feedback. That conversation encouraged me to start the day right, my friends light inspired me to shine my own.

            That’s what a friendship is all about, encouraging and celebrating with each other. Picking one another up when we fall and most importantly, realizing the value of it all. Loving Loud. Those who are constant in your life, those who invest in you, and you in them, will ultimately take part in forming you to the person you become. Realize the people who go above and beyond to be there, I encourage you to tell them thank you. They may not know what they mean to you and to many others.  “Iron sharpens iron”.

- Brandon            

photo credit

                
           

       How often during the day do you see an opportunity to show a stranger an act of random kindness? For me, I see opportunities everywhere I look. Whether it be carrying groceries, lending a couple bucks to help a person pay for something, or even a small act such as opening a door.

        In our daily schedule we move so quickly from point A to point B that we often miss the little things in life. We miss the chance to influence someone’s day in a positive way. Many times we are going so fast in life that we even miss saying thank you to someone who has help us. Each and every person looks for human interaction. It all leads to our need for community. The problem is, we are so caught up in their own lives that we don’t listen to the needs from others. We simply don’t notice. So in turn we miss out on little things that could allow connectivity.

      Last year my sociology professor told us that for extra credit he wanted us to find one way to positively impact a random strangers day. It had to be an original idea, and had to take place for at least 20 days. I had a million thoughts come into my head, but then I pinpointed one. I chose to write three letters, for three people, for thirty days.  Each letter had the same text, an “inspirational” message so to speak. I chose to give these letters to completely random strangers. I didn’t say anything to them when I handed one out, I simply gave it and walked off.

     The hardest part about giving out these letters wasn’t figuring out the words to say, or the confidence to hand them out. It was the fact that I would never know what they thought. We all want a positive reaction to our actions. We all want some form of confirmation. But, is that really what this whole thing is about, confirmation that we are helping others? The truth is, we may never know how we influence others. The letters I wrote may have meant nothing, something or everything to the people I gave them to. I may never find those answers. For me though, that’s the point. If we ever want to impact this world, we must convey selflessness through our daily life. I don’t know about you, but for me that word is often a very hard thing to act out. 

      All in all, the simplest conclusion to this topic is that in order to ever impact, influence or change the negative in this world is one act of random kindness at a time. 

So my challenge for whoever may be reading this is do you hesitate when opportunities to show love or kindness come up? Or do you notice the little things and take every opportunity you can to impact someone positively? 

As you go out today to accomplish your busy schedule, remind yourself to LOVE LOUD and take a chance. Who knows, your action may mean all the difference in the world for someone. 

-Brandon

I haven’t formally introduced myself, fellow SWL readers! I am Xanna, an eighteen year old Atlanta native. So we can get to know each other before I get started, here’s a few fun facts about me! I am a barista at my favorite local coffee shop. If I could be someone else for a day, I would want to be Laura Marling, Bon Iver (is that weird?), or Charity Rose Thielen. If I had to choose between a beach trip or mountain weekend, my heart belongs to the Blue Ridge Mountains. I write songs in my room. And I found So Worth Loving through mutual Atlanta friends! 

Now that you’ve gotten to know a little bit about me, I have something to share that lays heavy on my heart. One word that can make someone cringe:

 a n x i e t y. 

Anxiety is something that can go from stressing about a deadline, to keeping us up at night and putting a damper on our daily lives. Either way, it is never any fun! 

When I was in 9th grade, an adult in my life asked me if I was anxious due to constantly tearing at my clothes, biting my nails, and lack of focus, biting my lip, and never sleeping. She then explained to me that only insecure people ever feel anxious, and it would be looked down upon if I kept showing signs of anxiety disorders. As any ninth grader would feel, I was destroyed. I didn’t know what I was constantly anxious about, or even noticed it before she had pointed it out to me, but it was in my head after our conversation that I was an insecure person and that’s what was causing the signs of uneasiness.  Going on through high school, still an anxious teenager, I always felt like something was wrong with me, as most of us did in those lovely teen years. To be honest, sometimes when I catch myself biting my lip or over thinking and worrying about a situation, I still get the feeling that it’s wrong to be feeling how I am - which only makes the anxiety worse. 

But here’s the thing, anxiety is not anything to be ashamed of! I am still convinced that everyone gets anxious, nervous, and stressed sometimes. What it comes down to is knowing that being anxious does not  immediately make you an insecure person. It makes you human. It does not make you less worthy of love. Because no matter what our emotions are, everyone is worthy of love and loving themselves. So next time you sense someone is anxious or uneasy, let them know you’re there for them! And remind yourself that anxious or not, you are human who can love themselves, and be loved in return - anxious or not!